I
had a wonderful farewell party with my friends from Cluj-Kolozsvár in May,
2013. I knew already than, that next year in the same period I will be already
in Erfurt. I won a doctoral scholarship in Rome and in Erfurt too. Was one of
my best days to celebrate. Wonderful memories.
After
an unforgettable stay in Rome, I moved in Erfurt in the end of February, 2014.
My mother didn’t even know where is this city...my friends back home asked me,
where is this town known perhaps for some of us due to Luther and the worst
school massacre ever happened in Germany. In few days, I met all my obstacles
and challenges I will face in the next two years: language barriers, missing my
homeland, my old friends, people with the same mentality and world view, the
sunshine, warm and hot weather, the dynamic life of Cluj-Kolozsvár and Rome,
the beauty of Budapest. I found myself in a small city, with an amazing
architecture from its long time disappeared Medieval glory. A sleeping beauty,
which wakes up few times per year, mainly because of the great crowd of old,
local tourists. I passed a terrible insomniac period of two months (sleeping
3-4 hours per day) till I accepted the town. It was like a metamorphosis. You
accept it, or you run away. In my deepest darkness of insomnia, I decided to
walk around in the heart of the Altstadt, to discover all the small Medieval
streets, churches, gassen of the town. I found out, that it is not only
beautiful, but very peaceful too, especially if I can avoid people here. To
enjoy the small Gera, called generously by the locals as “small Venice”, the
beautiful sound of birds in the Louisenpark, the picturesque bridges there from
the 19th century and some of my favourites art nouveau doors from
the new part of the city. Erfurt, the empty, useless jewellery of Thüringia
became slowly a personality, with few hidden, lived beauties. It was an
interior journey too, healing myself from severe homesick and loneliness,
wondering through the streets of Erfurt and slowly, building my own universe
here. I was lucky to met some exceptional persons here, who arrived always in
those moments, when you are in the deepest “sh—t”. Probably, in a pathetic
discourse they would called the Angels. They are, actually. They helped me to
accept a city and an environment, which was so unfamiliar, so different, so new
for me in every details. They proved what the longest ever Harvard study did
few years ago: the secret of happiness and health is always to have quality
relationships and bonds. I’m really glad, that in my journey - in Erfurt and
beyond – I met amazing people. The last 4 years of my Ph.D. spent in 4
different countries crossed my journey with the life of hundreds of other
people. Beside the fact, that I was extremely luck to study in one of the best
academic environments of the world (for those at least who are interested in
Roman religion), I met also some fantastic researchers, who’s inspiring life
and journey gave me power to carry on and to believe, that once I will find
stability and a place called home, for what I’m seeking for since many years.
Hopefully, soon.
I
leave Erfurt. Will return several times, so farewells are useless in a
globalized world, where mobility of all kind of people are higher than ever –
especially in academia. But in many sense, I know, a chapter of my life ends now.
As it happened in 2013, when I left my beloved Cluj, or in 2007 when I left my
hometown. One need to summarize the journey, make some conclusions and express
his gratitude for all the beautiful memories experiences and lived in a period,
which marks my life.
So
thankful for that academic environment, I experienced here. A single picture,
which I will never forget, can tell this more, than any words: during the
International Congress of World Religions, where I was helper in that well
known blue shirt (my colleagues know!), I attended the opening lecture of Jörg
Rüpke in the Lived Ancient Religion panel. The small room was full with people,
there was no space to move. So many people were there, that some of them were
sitting on the floor, as in a meditation session. In the room I saw Christopher
Smith, Jörg Rüpke, Rubina Raja, Richard Gordon, Attilio Mastrocinque, Jan
Bremmer, Nicole Belayche, Corinne Bonnet, Greg Woolf, my friends from Rome,
Erfurt and the UK. This was for me something like the famous Hollywood selfie:
all of your idols in one room. Unforgettable.
Most
grateful for those few persons, who I met here and I’m considering them as
friends. I think, I was able to build up here a social life, which reflected my
old nature and my life back in my homeland. Bonds for a lifetime – let’s hope.
I’m
grateful for the inner journey I made here. Was my biggest and hardest challenge
till now, but surely helped a lot to get much stronger, adaptable and flexible
to hard environments and new situations. I learned to monitorize my own fears
and demons, insecurities. In some cases, with some persons I met here, this
didn’t work unfortunately. In most of the cases however, yes. And I’m glad for
that and grateful for those angels, who helped me in this embodied experience
from Erfurt, Weimar, Jena and home too.
